#PERIOD AFTER Jasmina Tesanovic - 03/05/1999- Belgrade


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May 3rd, 99
Yes, it happened, the blackout, in a city of two and a half million people: it happened for 16 hours, at the time I am writing it: but I think it happened for good, I think we got the message, we will never have the security of a modern society. Was that the NATO message? Well, we never had it even before. We had restrictions, black outs for days... at the time of Tito's full compliance with the whole world. We, political idiots are praised and punished in the same way: with blackouts. And we react to it as trained dogs. We gathered at the terrace and immediately put out all the items and ideas we had for survival, without electricity and water. We people of the terrace were just neighbors who hardly knew each other until the beginning of the war, but now we are in the same trench. We collected water in tubs and bottles, the last drops, we writers offered books for fire and other had grain, potatoes... We decided to go to bed at 8 p.m. with the sun and to organize morning gatherings of survival. We concluded, the worst are the planes, the bombs, the leaflets, the bridges falling down while you are trying to run away or get the food...Who's responsible for that? We didn't bother to say it. When will this end, most of them said we lost all the bets, it should have already ended. I said, June 2nd. Everybody felt relieved. This morning some parts of the city are getting back the light and the water. Not me: I am here at my friend's table with my portable computer writing my words as if they were last. Next to me workers are painting the window and the kids are baking the bread. Tomorrow, they said phone lines and last bridges will be destroyed. I want to say goodbye to too many people, so I say to none. I just say to myself: all this is behind us, tomorrow begins an afterlife... We buy candles in the church, they last longer and are cheaper, we buy batteries for radios, we buy simple food and plain water: no cigarettes, no alcohol...We fish old clothes and rearrange the furniture for practical purpose of life in the dark, in a group. All Belgrade is doing it, if not leaving the city...We are many cities from Calvino's Invisible Cities, the book I translated...I am not unhappy, I am only crying...
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