#PERIOD AFTER Jasmina Tesanovic - 25/05/1999- Belgrade


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May 25, 99
I thought I was out of my Africa, of my dark content of thoughts, hopes, fears... out in the limelight of the ongoing movie, the commedia dell'arte or circus that my life has become. And I was feeling superficial, young, as I used to be 20 years ago when I was a filmmaker...But then it happened: whilst we were trying to shoot the Museum of Tito, in occasion of the official date for his birthday celebration, the Holiday of Youth, as it used to be in his times, deep deep shame took me over. I realized it was noon, the alarm was on, I didn't know the whereabouts of my daughter, my husband was coming back from abroad, somewhere on the borders, during the night center Belgrade was hit again, only 100 meters from the point we were standing. And finally those soldiers who prevented us from filming the museum were all over Belgrade hiding under open sky, running for their lives, hoping that bombs go astray, because they were the military targets. Guys as me, as my children, whilst I wanted to make a nice shoot: legitimate request, which I would refuse too, in their place. As I refused as feminist many men curious onlookers of women's tragedies...My life will not become a circus: my choice to make this film with my friends is to remember and make remember those things that we will first forget, when we get the chance. It is a memorial of fear we are building in our film, and we are putting our own lives and bodies for its sake.
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